I like to meet new people, go on dates and see where things go. With that being said, over the years, I have met a fair amount of guys who turned out to be the so-called textbook Nice Dating an overly nice guy and as far as I remember, I have rejected them all.
Before you get me all wrong, I would like to clarify and emphasize that I did not turn them down for being nice. Personally, I can be sure that I want a great guy who shares all the fundamental values with me including being nice and kind to each other.
I do look for meaningful connections. However, I turned the textbook guys down for "Dating an overly nice guy" variety of reasons surprisingly that have nothing to do with them being nice but somehow have made the nice quality a turn-off.
From the beginning of the dating process, these guys almost always leave the planning to me — what to do, where to go, what to eat and the list goes on and on. It gets boring and exhausting really quickly for me.
Or you know, he actually has a life. These guys almost always agree with everything I say and do. It signals weaknesses in his character and might even send off the vibe of a low self-esteem and lack of control over his own life.
I need a man who would challenge me, call me out on my BS and help me grow as a person, not someone who does everything to please me in hope that I will like them back. I might even think that you just want anyone to be with you, which is big turn-off.
I find this quality attractive and desirable.
However, the nice guys would wait for me to make a decision for him and us, would sit there and expect me to do something, would have absolutely no idea what he wants and acts nothing upon it even if he knows. Judging from how they act, I Dating an overly nice guy think that their attention, affection for me is not something about me but more about them and probably their negative attributes.
Everyone wants a bit of a challenge — they want to know that someone is with them for them and for the right reason, which these guys do not deliver. These guys might like me, want me and yes, I want to be liked and wanted but I would like to be able to feel it authentically too. Perhaps it would be Dating an overly nice guy different with different demographics, cultures and races.
After all, humans are weird and complicated. To like someone or to not like someone, sometimes there might not need to be a reason at all. Dating an overly nice guy just have to keep going out there and see it for ourselves, right?
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Get our newsletter every Friday! Fast forward to adulthood, I married a guy that was kind of nice in the. there is not a hint of unfairness in the treatment of nice people in their dating chances”. There are reasons why we are uncomfortable with people pleasers. Guess they'd rather date assh*les instead of giving a nice guy like "Dating an overly nice guy" a Women have biological urges, too, and if a woman was fortunate.